I’ve moved this blog to a new URL. All of this wonderful content has been migrated, and I promise more wide ranging, fascinating, and occasionally, perhaps, even scintillating commentary on the new blog

Thanks for the memories, old site.

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I’ve moved this blog to a new URL.  All of this wonderful content has been migrated, and I promise more wide ranging, fascinating, and occasionally, perhaps, even scintillating commentary on the new blog

Thanks for the memories, old site.

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Imagine my surprise when I found out that a modified version of his already awesome song Wavin’ Flag is the Official FIFA World Cup 2010 Song.

Wait a minute, that’s not the suprising thing. There are official world cup songs?  Oh yes my friends, there are, and they are tragically fantastic!
(...)
Continue reading K’Naan, World Cup Songs & youtube hysteria

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A continuation of comments started on Twitter:
1: Eavesdropping on stupid conversations just because I could understand them.

2: Appreciating good service at bars/restaurants, but frustrated I couldn’t bark 服务员 when I needed something.

3: Small town America knows that you’re not from around here about as quickly as China.

4: Store your RMB Elsewhere. “Sir, you can’t pay with Canadian money” is more embarrassing than I expected.

5: Top replies to “We live in China”:

“What an adventure!”
“Do you like it?”
“I know [someone] in [somewhere that isn't China.]”

6: Driving long distances at high speed. Sure, I’ve spent an hour or two in a cab hurdling dangerously to the Pudong Airport, but I’d forgotten how much that, in America, outside a few dense urban cities, everything is 30min drive from everything else.

7: Drinking water from the tap.

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Take a gander around their blog and you’ll realize, like I have, that Ali and Evan may in fact be the CUTEST. PEOPLE. EVER.  More adorable than a box of puppies going to good homes or a newborn baby who never poops.  You can imagine how bad I feel that I can’t go visit them WHEN THEY REOPEN WEDNESDAY to give them hugs, wish them well, and most importantly, buy everything I can possibly afford.  You know why they’re the cutest?  Because in the midst of this, they still write odes of devotion to each other.  Witness Ali’s latest ode to Evan:

The above declaration is true: The cafe will be open tomorrow because of Evan. Sure, we all pitched in today, several of us for several hours in fact. There was even a plumber in there, finishing the last of the repair work. But at the end of the day, we all went home. All of us except Evan. He has accepted the fate of not sleeping tonight to make sure he can do everything possible so that we may open our doors tomorrow morning. He went to the cafe around 6am this morning and from what I’ve been able to gather from him, he will not be returning this evening. When I spoke with him last he informed me he is re-installing shelves, cooking fig jam, processing apple butter, and assembling a strata. This all after a day of financial advisory, lawyer talks, employee briefs, insurance debacles, and seemingly endless sweeping, dusting, washing, clearing, moving, and hauling. So that’s why the cafe’s reopening tomorrow actually owes itself to the tireless dedication of Evan, and Evan alone.

The world may not be completely fair, but good people can’t allow Ali and Evan to fail.  They work too hard, and they’re just so gosh darn swell.  Everyone in Portland, make it a top priority to visit them as soon as possible, as often as possible, because they’re awesome, their food is awesome (eat the strata. EAT IT), and they probably should be crowned King and Queen of Portland, because it’s people like them that make Portland the best city in America.

Little Red Bike Cafe
4823 N. Lombard
Portland, Oregon 97203
Tuesday-Sunday
8am-2pm
503-289-0120

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Now I present an Achewood comic, encapsulating how I treated (or wanted to trick) my interns.

hat tip to one of the two Nats.

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3rd Annual Holiday Booze Bazaar

Saturday, December 13th, 2008, 1pm-5pm

2025 SE 7th ave. Portland, OR

Free to the public, 21 and over
Hosted by House Spirits Distillery
Makers of Aviation Gin, Medoyeff Vodka & Krogstad Aquavit

2008 Vendors:

Sub Rosa Spirits (makers of the great Tarragon Vodka and Saffron Vodka)

Ransom Spirits (outstandingly crafted local grappas and port)

Absinthe Marteau (locally-made super yummy Green Fairy)

Imbibe Magazine (Portland published go-to for all things drinkable)

Joyas de Panama Cigars (importer of delicious, organic and sustainable Panamanian cigars)

Xocolatl de Davíd (2 words: BACON CARAMELS!)

Fraga Farm Goat Cheese (wonderful artisan cheese from Sweet Home, ORE.)

Oregon Cheese Guild (they’re over a dozen Oregon cheesemakers strong!)

This event marks the long awaited release of the APOTHECARY line, to be sold exclusively in our on-premise store. The APOTHECARY line will consist of small batch, limited quantity liquors and liqueurs that come in handy 375ml bottles. We have a few items to be released, one being OREGON OUZO, that we’ll be tasting at the event. The Booze Bazaar will also herald the opening of the store on Saturdays from 12/13/08 forward, hours TBA.

The address is: 2025 SE 7th ave.
Portland, OR

I’ll be heading over to look for Christmas gifts and a lil somethin’ somethin’ to keep me warm in this frigid weather.  See you there!  If you’re going to be there hit me up on twitter or look for the snappily dressed hipster.  I’ll be standing on the other side of the room from him.

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Borrowed from Flickr user ThomasHawk

Urban Chickens

There is another option for Portland’s roosters on the run: about 40 minutes from downtown, just off the Mount Hood Highway in the town of Boring, sits Geren’s Farm Supply. The feed store has long operated a small, low-ceilinged shed called the Critter Korner, where farmers bring unwanted livestock. Geren’s then sells the animals. In recent years, however, city people have turned Geren’s into a kind of relocation center for banished roosters, according to Roz Rushing, the daughter of Geren’s owners. “I’ve had grown men in tears because they raised them as babies and they live in the city and can’t have a rooster,” Rushing says from behind the feed-store counter, where a dry-erase board keeps a running tally of Critter Korner’s population, and an orange cat named Mr. Dunn naps amid the day’s paperwork. “Then there’s some people, they’ve been spurred by their roosters, and they can’t wait to get rid of ’em. They say, ‘Take it away now. I never want to see it again.’”

I identify with these poor Chickens of the wrong gender.  I also am far too loud for the neighbors and if my Girlfriend had her way, I’d be left at a Feed Supply Store waiting for a lonely trucker to take pity on me.

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I don’t understand why people who don’t cook 364 days a year suddenly think they can cook a large meal that involves roasting a whole animal. –Matt from Biwa

The man has a good point.  I was in a fun position this year; I participated in another family’s traditions, in which the day’s schedule, alcohol list, recipes and soundtrack were (nearly) completely determined more than a decade ago.

So what’s a decent chef or excellent amateur cook to do?  Stay the fuck out of the way? Try to be helpful?  Well, my friends, I figured it out:

Tasting&Complaining’s Rules for Attending (Other peoples’) Thanksgiving Traditions (RATT):

• Offer to do all the prep work, to their specifications.

Reason: They get to start drinking early and admire your knife skills.  You get to stay busy, thus not suspiciously silent.  Also, you don’t start drinking early.

• Watch them cook per their traditions, stay out of the way, ask questions and compliment their recipes.

Reason: Practice with me:

“Wow, I didn’t think a recipe so simple would be so delicious!”

“French’s Onions make everything better.”

“Ok Uncle Trent, I’ll man the Fire Extinguisher while you fry that Turkey.”

“This pie is fantastic! did you make it? (only useful if you can see the Sarah Lee box from your seat)”

• Offer to prepare the Brussels Sprouts.

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